Someone once told me, ‘You live in fantasy; you need to be more practical.’ I quietly listened to the comments of an irritated person who was tired of fighting a situation and felt everything was going against her. She felt I keep smiling or at times giggling at every opportunity I get which is not a sign of maturity. I have a (bad/good) habit of humming songs to myself, which comes naturally to me. She told me it gives an impression of an immature person whom people never take seriously.
She is always serious looking, constantly living in future and out of present; what was she achieving by showcasing her ‘matured’ demeanour? Why was she struggling with situation with her so called maturity which made people feel she was snobbish?
People often mistake positivity with fantasy. Fantasy is expecting something out of nothing, without putting in efforts or fighting out the situation, expecting magic out of nowhere. Whereas positive thinking keeps one going even in the worst of situations. Positivity is, giving your one hundred percent and still when everything seems to be going against you, expecting and accepting that this phase will not last forever. It is about diverting our mind from negativity of the circumstances and channelizing our thoughts and energy towards efforts or ways which can help us come out of self-pity or aggression against the adverse conditions. It is hoping for best out of worst, knowing and believing that our genuine efforts will never go waste. Success may be delayed but certainly not denied. At times this adversity throws us out of our comfort zone only to realise later that it was actually uncomfortable and compromising zone for us, which was not conducive for our growth.
Since we cannot see the future, when something unexpected happens and throws our life out of gear, we fumble and focus prominently on the negative aspects, leading to filling our mind with darkness, suspicion and irritation.
One gentle push to ourselves towards the hope and we can change the unfavourable situation into a favourable one. This is hope and not fantasy.